When life experiences create unavoidable traumas we underestimate the impact on our health and behaviour. We have emotional and physical burnout which is a feeling of despondency and fatigue affecting our motivation.
Some of us turn to self medication through substances or process such as food, drugs, sex, gambling, over working, or becoming busy with chaotic unmanageability. Others withdraw and resort to sleeping too much or isolating. Some suffer untreated depression or other illnesses leading to suicidal thoughts.
All of these problems can be resolved. Primarily we need to rest and recuperate without feeling guilty whilst nature takes its healing course. This can be achieved through relaxation created by meditation, yoga, walking, swimming, meeting with friends and giving ourselves the time to recover.
Then we need to be medically checked, perhaps attend counselling, improving our nutrition and even taking supplements (vitamins). Furthermore and importantly we need to make ourselves reach out to friendly people and be transparent about our struggle. We can gain support in doing that just as we can give it to others later on.
It is vital to remember through the worst time that things will improve in time and before long we will find the motivation to succeed again.
As I sat in the dark tunnel as a result of a disaster
I wondered if the light at the end was an oncoming train or
the thrill of sunshine and happier days
now when I look back on that emotional and physical burnout
I chuckle to myself for letting it appear so hopeless
what the effeects of burnout on the eyes? It makes sense that if your body & mind are burnt out your eyes will suffer too. Please let me know your thoughts. I’m asking as I am burnt out after a stressful time in my life and my eyes seem burnt out too (not literally don’t worry) and I’m wondering if it is a standard thing to experience or whether I should start freaking out.
Renato, you have experienced much sadness – I hope you are getting support from a separation counsellor to help you through the transition period. You don’t have to go through this alone. Take care. Regards Affie
my wife could only think about herself and our two young children.
She is very angry with me and wants me out of her life. She does not want to be married to me anymore. She says things like you had 14 years to fix yourself now its over.
We have been through so many life events in the last 6 years – deaths in both families close to us, an autistic eldest son, redundancy, financial hardships, interfering mother in-law, disappointments and lack of sleep caused by our young children on both of us.
At this point we can only talk via our lawyers and she is so irrational to talk to. We are now in the process of selling the house and I can’t reason with her about co-existing under the same roof.
I feel our marriage is finished and that the legal separation we are about to get into will finish it completely.
I’ve spent some time perusing your website. There’s much on there that’s extremely helpful, and particularly relevant to me. Your “musings” on various topic areas are very inspirational, and will undoubtedly be of practical and, dare I say it, “spiritual” benefit to many people.
P.S. “Spiritual” is NOT synonymous with supernatural. It is only the latter that I have problems with (along with traditional notions of God). AA is spiritual because it does not use any physical means of healing. Spiritual means non-physical, and involves things like faith, hope and love. Spiritual refers to a state of consciousness in which there is a total and altogether healthy integration of thoughts, feelings and the will (in a curative fashion) with consequent purpose, meaning and direction, all with an attendant sense of belonging – a “feeling of being at home in the universe” (William James). It’s a shame that so many Humanists are frightened of the word, and are ignorant of its true meaning.