Willingness to be abstinent

Breakthrough, photo by Stefanie L., Meppen, GermanyPeople who are torn apart by their addiction can lose years struggling to find happiness. Having unhealthy behaviour, whether it is substance or process excesses, keeps us from finding fulfilment and serenity. Nevertheless, only when we become willing to go to any lengths to gain recovery are we able to achieve this freedom. The willingness to be abstinent is not so easy as it sounds. That is why it can be achieved with help from professionals and from self help groups where people have the experience to share about how they did it. Such groups are primarily the 12 Steps fellowship and/or SMART Recovery. The important thing to remember is NOT TO STOP SEARCHING FOR A SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM.

he had so much knowledge about recovery
yet he kept relapsing and was miserable
sometimes he felt that his life was hopeless
and that he should end it
nevertheless he did not give up
33 detox attempts still did not help
then one day like a bolt of lightening
he came out of the tunnel and the
light was not an oncoming train
instead he saw the sun and the trees
his only regret was the years he had wasted
until he found the willingness to be abstinent
at least it was ‘better late than never’!

Breakthrough, photo by Stefanie L., Meppen, Germany,

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5 thoughts on “Willingness to be abstinent”

  1. I have lived with depression for many years. I had someone say to me recently that I need to stop focusing on the outcome and concentrate on the process itself, the outcome is secondary. Just living day to day, not concerning myself with all the tomorrows or yesterdays. I have these ‘trauma relapses’ but I get up after that and keep going almost inexplicably. I am addicted to love and struggling to come to terms with the end of my marriage. Remembering it is about getting the process right is the thing that keeps me moving in the right direction.

  2. @ Daisy: When you keep doing what works then you have a healthy outcome. Remember that if you have become vulnerable with depression then you could be managing well but when something traumatic comes along in your life then later you pay the price. It is like an anniversary of the trauma kicks in your depression even if you have been doing everything else to maintain a healthy life. Then if you explore what you did the same time a year ago or a few months ago that you experienced the trauma, just becoming conscious of that will help your recovery.

  3. I struggle with depression and lots of things help me shift to a better space. Movement, acuppuncture, counselling, support, good choices etc, but a few poor choices and I’m spirallng down again. My heart is tight and there is little space in me at the moment and I’m frustrated looking for work, but all I can do is to take the next step I can see towards healing and then the next one. endlessly forever, I’m so tired but there is nothing else to do.

  4. So true! I have a relative that’s fighting drug addiction, and sometimes I’m not convinced he is ready to give it up. He has tried a few times to give up but only half-heartedly.

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